“NIGHT GIRL”

My wife and I live with her mom. We have lived with her for the last 8 years. When we go to sleep she always says, “night girls.” This used to not bother me. It didn’t even bother me when I first told her I was non-binary, but lately it has started to really make me angry. I feel this is because of the the way things have changed because of covid. . Before covid I wasn’t at home all the time. I went to the gym for 2 hours a day, church on Sunday, a gaming group every other Saturday, and recreational therapy every other Wednesday. At three of these places I got to hear people use gender neutral pronouns. This helped to make things not as upsetting at home when my mother in-law uses the wrong pronouns.

I have always been very patient with her, because she has had brain surgery and has memory issues, but lately I find myself being shot with her. My wife has also started doing the same thing. Anytime she uses “she“ in a sentence in reference to me Jennifer says, “you mean, Meredith!” I think my mother in-law is getting frustrated as well, because she has started to not try as much as she was in the beginning.

Before covid I would correct her when she would use “she“ instead of “Meredith” by saying, “Whisper didn’t do that”. Whisper happens to be our female cat. I did this to try to lighten the fact that she wasn’t using the right pronouns. However, this doesn’t help anymore. I think it upsets her as well. I had hoped that since my wife is around more, because of covid, things would get better. I just have to remember to take one day at a time and breathe.

This is probably a stupid thing to write a blog about, but it has been bothering me for sometime and I had to write it down to help me process through this. Which is the main reason I started this blog. It was to help me process through my struggles and maybe help others like be process through theirs. So if you know someone who is walking almost the same footsteps as me, please take time to share this with them. Maybe we can help each other along the way.